Courtship Chronicles! The name I decided for the series about me navigating the dating scene as a 30-something poly kinky girl. In addition to keeping my eyes open in kinky gatherings and parties, my main tool is Tinder. I’ve heard that Tinder in different countries is slightly different in its functionality, like for example it’s mainly for hookups. In a tiny country like Finland, it’s pretty much one of the major dating app that serves all kinds of purposes. And since I’m not being very specific what I’m looking for, it serves me well enough.
The dating part hit the ground running starting last week. I matched with a fellow kinkster on Tinder and went to have a drink with him last week. He was nice and we had fun chatting but I’m not sure we had that much chemistry. Plus he smokes, and I’m not that into it. But then I started chatting with this other guy on Tinder from Friday. He is 28-year-old. I know, guess I’m starting my cougar business early. XD I’m actually meeting him for the first time for a drink today, in a couple of hours. The reason I wanted to write this now is cos I want to capture this moment when I’m crushing hard on someone, before the tension dissolve with meeting face to face.
I have crushes on people all the time, but most of the time it’s ‘hey I like you’ and mostly it’s that they are good-looking in my eyes and their personality is nothing too turn-off-y. But then there are giant crushes. I don’t get them often, especially for someone I haven’t met yet. And I thought it would be interesting at least for myself to try and identify the reasons what make me crush hard on someone whom I haven’t even met yet.
I have a really multi-layered sense of humor. I love making people around me laugh so I adapt and change my humor to what I’m sure they can get. Cos laughing together creates a sense of inclusivity and it’s a bonding experience. I have a quick wit, even if I do say so myself, so situational humor is pretty much my jam most of the time. My humor is also very sarcastic and from time to time extremely dark so I tend to get a feel of the crowd first and judge what they can take. In other words, I have to censor myself when it comes to my humor most of the time. I count it as a win when people get my jokes enough to laugh. It’s a completely different experience when someone manages to match my sarcasm with more sarcasm. I also use a lot of nerdie and pop-cultury references. Basically, you gotta be Deadpool to get all of my stuff. XD I can probably count with one hand how many of my friends can do it, so when I find someone that matches me humor-wise, I grab onto them hard. 😛
Just like humor, I don’t find people to match my nerdiness, like watch and read and play the same stuff. I just like nerds in general but I do enjoy a nerd especially much when they like the same things as me.
It’s been a long time that I giggled this much while texting with someone, and also laughing out loud. It’s actually very nice to be one laughing and not only the one making others laugh. 🙂 I forgot how fun it can be for someone to put effort into making me laugh.
Open for communication
This is one of the most important aspects that I appreciate in any types of relationship, and I truly appreciate it when the other person is open to communicate even the not-so-pleasant stuff without me having to try to make them open up to me. Makes everything easier.
I’m actually pretty surprised at this, how much I seem to like people who hustle. I don’t care that much about whether someone is career-oriented or ambitious, as long as they work hard, they earn my respect.
There they are. 🙂 Of course, I’m not a saint here. In fact, so many of my friends call me shallow. I do have to first and foremost find their appearance attractive. Sixpacks and blue eyes always help. But it’s usually the fact that they speak fluent sarcasm and those other points mentioned above that make me form a giant crush on someone. Sorry if you came here for something kinky. 😀 I will try to come up with something for next week. Wish me luck for tonight’s date! I will keep you posted. 😛 Until then, stay kinky! 😉