Fifty Shades of Orgasms, part 3

I wrote a little cheeky list of different types of orgasms I usually get back in 2016 in part 1 and then my struggles and how I seem to slowly start to overcome them in 2019 in part 2. After I wrote that I still had problems with cumming with other people and I still had that little talk with every new partner about how I don’t orgasm easily and ask them not to take it personally. I estimated that I cum maybe 10% of the time and that remained true until I met Steve.

Before I go more in depth into that, I feel like I should explain what happened between my last post about orgasms and me meeting Steve. Back in mid-2019, I was still having a friends with benefits relationship with Oliver and that lasted until mid-2020 aka when the pandemic was going hot. I did cum from time to time with Oliver but it wasn’t consistent at all and in no shape or form a guaranteed thing. During that year with Oliver, I did have other random partners and now in retrospect, it was surprising that I did manage to orgasm with new partners even during the first time. But there would always be a gimmick or something. Like being with a woman that I had a giant crush with and she fucked harder than most men I’ve been with. 😀 And with a guy who had a Prince Albert piercing in his penis and goddamn it felt amazing. And even with Oliver, there had to be something extra like bondage or anal etc in order for me to cum. So I was quite serene with my state. I knew my body was capable of orgasming with other people too, I just needed a little bit extra oomph to it. I was just happy that I could do it, after everything.

So after our partnership ended with Oliver, I didn’t have a long-term partner for a long time. Here and there was some action but when the end of 2020 hit, I was just exhausted trying to find a new steady partner in the midst of a pandemic. I decided to take a break and I didn’t date anyone or even tried to for a whole year. I knew I could do it cos of my experience with one year of voluntary celibacy back in 2018. It was actually quite nice, to not to have to think about it. I didn’t even masturbate much. I just went with how I felt and I felt zen. Turned out I was extremely good at being by myself. I guess for the first time in my life, I didn’t think about sex or orgasms on a regular basis for an extended period of time. And in addition to that, I wasn’t worried that I didn’t think about it. And maybe that helped my body re-center itself with its relationship with sex and orgasms. I am not saying it was all me. XD Not at all. I’ve 100% sure I wouldn’t be where I am now if my next steady play partner is anyone else but Steve. 😀 All the orgasm stars were lining up for it to happen.

So in November 2021, I was ready to get back out there. I started a friends with benefits relationship with Steve whom I’ve known through a mutual friend but didn’t exactly stay in contact with for five years. But there was some connection there so it was relatively easy to jump into things – I felt like I already knew him. And that layer of intimacy during sex even from the first time we had sex, I figured it must be because I was capable of being quite vulnerable in front of him. I felt a strong sense of kinship with him cos I felt like he was very similar to me and that I can tell him anything about myself and I would never face judgment from him. And that type of mental nakedness must have transferred to the physical realm cos it literally took us several times of having sex, and I was surprised with me orgasming. Without any gimmicks. It was just regular sex. I have to admit that our bodies and especially the naughty parts couldn’t be more compatible and he could hit various points of sensitive flesh without even trying.

Fast-forward a few months, we meet roughly 1-3 times a week depending on our mutual schedules, and I can safely say that I’m badly spoiled. After that first time of me cumming, it just kept happening. Every time we have sex. Sometimes multiple orgasms. In every position – even standing up or me on top. And all kinds of orgasms – vaginal, clitoral, anal and g-spot ones with fingering. And the kicker is, I don’t have to work for it. They just come by themselves. There are really no words to describe how freeing it all feels. I could never believe that I could be that girl who is basically guaranteed to orgasm during sex. Maybe the gimmick here is that I have a giant crush on him, or maybe it’s cos we are anatomically and physically compatible. Or maybe, the gimmick is freedom from the stress of having to orgasm. We even had a mini marathon one day to test how many times we both could cum and it was over double digits for me. But that’s a story for another day. Until then, stay kinky! 😉

Is That a Thing? – Genital Piercings

Okay, I have a thing for piercings. Not on myself, I probably wouldn’t get any after some bad experiences in my youth. But I love piercings on others. I like how they look, how they feel. For example, I don’t like kissing that much, but add a lip and/or tongue piercing and I could basically squirt from just kissing. I guess fetishes are fetishes and some of them just can’t be explained.

So, there is this guy in the scene whom I’ve seen many times now. He tends to stick with his partners and doesn’t really socialize. But recently, he became more active and I got to know him a bit. He is anything but shy about his bodies and he happens to have genital piercings. So at the kinky party on the Valentine’s day, he was hanging out with his partners and invited me and my friend to see his piercings. And being curious little pervs that we were, we accepted the invitation. He is a good-looking guy but not really my type, but his cock, now that’s a beautiful looking cock. And what made it even more beautiful in my eyes was the sizeable ring piercing on the tip of his cock. He got about half a dozen more on his testicles. They were soooo pretty. My friend and I ooh’d aaah’d at the piercings for a moment till I asked his partners how the ring feel inside of the vagina, and he chuckled and asked ‘Wanna try?’ It would have been a lame pick-up line that shouldn’t have worked in a million years… unless you use it on a couple of girls who are both into piercings. We decided that we have to give it a go, FOR SCIENCE!

I got to see it in action first, and judging by my friend’s reaction to the cock, the rings seem to be equally pretty and functional. And before I got to try it in my vagina, I first got to see whether I feel it in my mouth. Even through a condom, I could feel the ring poking the back of my throat, making me gag very easily. And for someone who loves to gag, it was pretty hot. I was already quite turned on by all of it and I didn’t need any foreplay. His cock went inside of me without any friction, and for a solid minute or two, my jaw was dropped from the sheer surprise and shock that I think I could actually feel the ring through the condom. There are no words to explain how erotic it felt, it felt like kissing with a tongue ring except there was a cock in my pussy. XD

After the initial disbelief of the whole situation, I realized why it felt so darn good. Cos with every single thrust he was hitting my A-spot and that’s rare from a doggy style when he wasn’t being that rough. For those who aren’t familiar with the A-spot, it’s like the G-spot except it is quite far in, pretty close to the cervix. Some girls don’t like their cervix being poked with the cock, but I happened to love it. A-spot is my favorite spot in my genitals and A-spot orgasms are also very intense and different. His cock was also pretty long, about 18 cm I think, but my vagina is also 18 cm until it hits the cervix. So in theory, he should occasionally hit my A-spot provided he thrusts hard enough. But I swear, because of the ring, he hits that spot every time. It was literally driving me crazy it felt so good. And then those rings on his balls. From behind, they slammed against my labia and clit with every movement. It was pure ecstasy and instead of orgasming once or twice, the pleasure level stayed extremely high with occasional peaks. So if a regular clitoral orgasm is pleasure level 6/10, this whole experience from the first thrust till the last was solid 8/10 with occasional 9/10. Only anal orgasms have been more intense than this was.

In retrospect, this was quite remarkable. Cos I wasn’t that attracted to him, but I’m definitely in love with his cock and the rings. And I usually don’t orgasm on the first time I have sex with someone, and definitely not from vaginal sex only. Without the rings, it would have definitely been vanilla, but with those rings, it became my piercing fetish come true. Ten out of ten, would do it again. 😛

Courtship Chronicles, part 12 – The Year 2019

So the year 2019 is coming to an end soon enough and it’s time to look back how my year was dating-wise. I do have to admit that I started with a bang. 😀 I was very hard-working and going on first dates quite frequently in the first half of the year. But then my mental health wasn’t doing so good in June and I got super lazy dating-wise. I did write down stuff on my calendar though and with that data, I created a nice infographic to sum it all up. 😀 Let’s go through it together!

So I was on 23 first dates, meeting almost two new people per month. Most were fun, some are weird and some went very well but no second dates. And since I’m not the type to run after anyone, they would fade out quite quickly. I do think that if the conversation doesn’t continue naturally and organically despite a great first date, then there must be not enough interest.

I had ten new partners this year, which means I had sex with ten new people. I had a long debate with several people what counts as sex, but in my humble opinion, my definition for myself is a new dick in my pussy, to put it crudely. A couple of them happens to be dildos attached to strap-ons but in all intent and purposes, it’s the same thing. Out of those ten, five of them were what I like to call ‘accidental one-night-stands’. Meaning I do not ever set out to have a one-night-stand, but sometimes after the first time, I simply don’t want a second time.

I didn’t keep track of how many people I chatted up but it never has gone far enough to set up a date. One guy ghosted me after the first date and I gave him a blowjob just cos I was being nice. Two were pretty flaky, as in they canceled on the day we were supposed to meet for coffee and didn’t make a real effort to re-schedule again. And two didn’t cancel at all, they simply didn’t show up for dates. I would never understand no-shows and ghosting, like what is the purpose of that? Oh well, onto more adventures.

Finally, I also tracked how many of the new people were kinky and how many nillas aka vanillas. Funny enough, most of those seven nillas do claim to be either kinky or even dominant. Well, they weren’t. 😀 And two out of those three kinksters were women and one guy. Yes, you guessed it, the one kinky guy is Oliver. You’ll know who he is if you’ve been following my blog. 😀

It’s the year 2020 next year. And I’m going to challenge myself and get 20 new partners. In other words, I want to double it! All just for fun and for that round number of 20. 😀 Cos, why not right. 😛 So, do expect more content as ‘Courtship Chronicle’ continues, stronger than ever. Until then, stay kinky! 😉

Is That A Thing? – Water Bondage

I once saw a video about a girl being fucked from behind in the bathroom while her head was being pushed under water in a tub. It was one of the hottest videos I’ve ever seen and ever since then I’ve always wanted to try it. I love all kinds of breath play. Something about me being rendered not able to breathe just turns me on immensely. From choking to blocking my mouth and nose with hand, I like all types. Being pushed under water was the next step. I’ve suggested to a few people before and none of them really got excited about the idea. I have no idea why wouldn’t drowning and fucking at the same time sound appealing to everyone? XD

When I initially presented this longtime fantasy of mine to Oliver, he didn’t seem be a fan of it. But then we saw a beautiful picture of a girl being submerged in a big see-through box filled with water and then he said he wanted to do it. What I didn’t expect was how fast he would just happen upon a big see-through box and last week he sent me a pic of the box in the evening and invited me to have a little spa trip at his place. I didn’t dare to have expectations, cos fantasies don’t always align with reality but let’s just say it was way hotter than I could ever imagine…

I arrived at his place, talked pleasantries, drank a beer and discussed how we were going to go about it. I requested being tied up, it kinda made more sense to me. I also requested the box be filled with cold water, because I can hold my breath better in cold water. In retrospect, it was pretty odd that we actually didn’t discuss any safety measures, I don’t think we ever did. He still jokes around that I never told him what the safe word was. Safewords had never even crossed my mind when I’m playing with him, cos he has always been very caring. Although it would be weird not to discuss safety measures when it comes to water bondage with literally anyone else, with Oliver it felt natural. I trust him fully.

He bound my hands behind my back and made a little harness around my upper body with a sturdy handle in the back. It is one of my favorite bondage design, I adore the handle in my back because it is very convenient for holding on while being fucked from behind. He made it extra tight this time around my arms, the rope digging in my arms when he pulled tight and I couldn’t help but gasp with every pull of the rope. I like it when ropes hurt just a bit, when they are just a little too tight at places where it wouldn’t cut off my blood circulation. I like it when I could feel the texture of the rope.

When he was done tying me up, he pushed me down on my knees on his ridiculously soft carpet and pushed my head on the sofa. He fucked my throat a bit. I still can’t believe he was the same guy who actually didn’t like throat fucking the first time he did it but now fucks my throat more brutally than most people I’ve ever played with. XD It is just another form of breath play. 😛

Then came a hard spanking. After a thorough warm-up with some bare hand spanking, he left me kneeling and came back dragging that nasty wooden shoehorn across the floor with him. I fucking hate that thing. It produces the nastiest type of sharp pain that I could hardly stand. Especially on my calves and the bottom of my feet. I loved it and I hated it when he held onto my ankle to force my foot to keep in place then gave it a few firm hits. To top it all off, he also fingerfucked me with a rubber glove on. I have a thing for rubber gloves, I might need to talk about them later. For some reason, I just get really turned on by them.

So I was well prepared, my butt tenderized, my mind all fuzzy with arousal and the buzz caused by extreme pain and pleasure. He left me tied up lying on the floor while he went to prepare the box. I heard water running in the bathroom through my heavy breathing and the sound made me shivered involuntarily. It was time, we moved to the bathroom.

The next thing I knew, I was kneeling in front of a big see-through box filled with cold water almost to the brim. He got green mood lighting in the bathroom and it turned the box and water looking greenish, like the lake. I started giggling, cos for some reason seeing the green water terrified me. And yes, my natural reaction to intense fear was to giggle for some reason. With one quick move, he grabbed my hair and pushed it down towards the box and I think I screamed out loud but then he pulled me back up and he said ‘just kidding’. I fucking hate him sometimes… He realized just how scared I was and decided to prolong the torture.

Then it came, the first dip. He dunked my head under water and I didn’t expect the sour smell of getting water in my nose – the smell of drowning. I didn’t even notice the cold of the water. Then he kneeled behind me and put his cock in my pussy. I started moaning immediately, his cock felt so damn good. But then he grabbed hold of my hair and pushed my face into the cold water.

Momentarily everything became quiet and it felt like time stopped. And all at once, all the sensations rushed forward, starting from my pussy. I became ultra aware of his cock going in and out. His hand pulling my hair. The sour smell in my nose. The coldness that seemed to wake every bit of me. The sounds that he made, the same sounds he only makes when he is doing something that turns him on very much. When he pulled me back up and I took my first breath, I felt my pussy pulsing and I realized I was about to cum. I think I told him I was cumming, not sure whether he heard me, but just when I was about to cum, he pushed my head back down the water and I was suspended on the verge of an orgasm but not quite able to cross over. When my head broke the surface of the water again, I fucking exploded. It was the most peculiar thing, to have your orgasm being put on hold like that. And it was almost embarrassing how quickly I orgasmed, for someone who doesn’t cum easily, I basically cummed within no more than a minute.

After the initial orgasm, my whole body became hyper-aware. The coldness of water dripping down my hair onto the rest of the body making me shiver. How amazing it felt when he decided to do it rapidly, pushing me under until my head bucked and pulling me back up, letting me take one breath and pushed me back down and repeat. And repeat. And then many times more. It was breath-taking literally and all the while he was fucking me hard in my pussy. I have no words to describe how fucking hot all of that was.

At the end of it, I was breathing hard and shaking a bit uncontrollably. He took the shower, putting on some warm water and showered me all over. It felt beyond divine. Then he proceeded to slowly untie the soaking wet ropes. He did it unbelievably slowly, letting me feel every wet fiber of the rope running across my skin. I adored how incredibly intimate it felt, the ropes and his bare body against my back and his head over my shoulder and his scent surrounding me. When my arms came free and the blood rushed through my limbs, it was the sweetest pain ever and he embraced me from behind. It was a very tender moment that I couldn’t help ruining. Cos I suddenly realized that my hair was still soaked in cold water and in front of me. Him hugging me close from behind was just too tempting of an opportunity not to be bratty. With one smooth flick of my head, my hair flew in an arc backwards and the ice cold wet tips of my long hair hit his naked back. I giggled from a very annoyed growl he let out behind me. He threatened me with peeing in my hair. Not sure how that was even a threat cos a warm golden shower just sounded pleasant to me.

There. That was my first experience of water bondage. I freaking loved it. I’m eternally grateful for Oliver for realizing my long-time fantasy, it was better than I’ve hoped for. I’m sure it won’t be the last time. 😛

Fifty Shades of Orgasms, part 2

I’ve written about orgasms before, in the part 1, go read it, it was super funny. I might have discussed my relationship with orgasms here and there but I guess I’ve never told the whole story in one post. Let’s talk about that today!

Nowadays, whenever I have a new partner, I have to have this little talk with them. “Listen… my relationship with orgasms is really complicated.” I’m not a fan of that convo, but I just want to let them know that it’s all me and what I like to called orgasmically handicap. Let me start from the very beginning.

I started masturbating really early, like before I even had my period or boobs. But no one taught me how, so for years and years till my late teens, I just rubbed my pussy against my blanket to get off. I lost my virginity when I was 15, but I’ve never, not once had an orgasm during vaginal intercourse until I was like… maybe 25 or something. Or 26. I never masturbated with my fingers, I never explored it. I know my own lady parts inside out cos I like to look at it a lot when I was younger, but I just didn’t like touching myself with my own fingers. With my first boyfriend, I got my first orgasms through him giving me oral. But they were like really weak and behind hard work. After my first boyfriend, I discovered vibrators and finally knew what a strong ass orgasm feels like. It took me quite a while, in other words.

Then came my exfiance. I got a couple of vaginal orgasms with him, I like to believe purely by accident. I used to get them when I was on top and kinda rubbing my clit against them. So I guess not purely vaginal Os. When our sex life quieted down, he became obsessed with me cumming. Probably because he thought that I would want to have sex with him more if I cummed every time. In the beginning, it was exciting. Fun even. Cos my exfiance was really freaking vanilla, but can’t say he didn’t have stamina though. He was very good at really steady humping, which to be honest, can be very good for female orgasms. Well for most girls I guess. So he and I combined fucking and vibrator a lot. But gradually it became harder and harder for me to cum. I didn’t know back then that it was because I wasn’t into vanilla sex. But anyways, he would just become more and more obsessed with getting me off. To a point that I resented it, resented him. Orgasms became hard as fuck to achieve.

So when he and I broke up, I swore to myself that I would never ever force myself to cum anymore. I told all my partners then never to force me. Even to my dominants back then. Then it became weird. With doms I mean. Cos suddenly I had to ask for permission to cum. It was fun in the beginning. Especially with my last Dom Atticus, it was all-consuming. I gave so much of myself and my sexuality to him that during some point, he could basically make me cum on command. But when we broke up, all of it went to shit.

For over four months after the break-up, I couldn’t even masturbate. I was literally incapable of cumming, scared shitless that I would have a mental breakdown over the fact that there was no one to ask for permission and I was miserable. It took me a whole year to finally be in more control of my own body, to take back my orgasms so-to-speak. And orgasms I get from masturbation had literally never been better than the ones I get nowadays.

But one problem still remains, it’s next to impossible for me to cum with others. It’s extremely hard to cum by masturbation in front of my partners, I’ve all but given up on the hope to cum during sex ever again. I mean sure, with a vibrator it can happen. It had happened a couple of times with Oliver. I just think that my body is simply not capable of it anymore because I have such a strong mental block now.

But then, something magical happened last session with Oliver. It was after being tied up and spanked. I was on my all fours with an anal hook up my ass and tied to my neck and hair. He had made me gag many times throat fucking me. He had also pulled a thick textured rope through the anal hook before and it felt like a strong vibrator against the anal plug. It drove me absolutely crazy with lust. I’m sure it was all of that, and also we haven’t played in a while so my body missed him. He then played with me some more with my vibrator, pressing, not just keeping it on my clit but moving it back and forth from the anal hook in my butt across my wet pussy to my clit and back. And the fact that the anal hook was pulling my hair rendering me almost immobile and in an extremely uncomfortable position and it felt like I couldn’t escape the sensory overload. And I fucking loved it all.

Then he started to fuck my pussy, pushing the anal hook even deeper in me and placing the vibrator against my sensitive clitoris. I really don’t have enough words to explain how good it felt, I couldn’t get enough how good his cock felt in my pussy. And all of a sudden, without any warning, like a bomb went off in my netherparts, without anyone yelling ‘incoming’. I exploded. My vision blurred, I couldn’t feel the tension and discomfort on my hair or neck or shoulders, my ears were ringing. I must have screamed cos my throat felt raw afterward. I still can’t believe that I cummed. And not just once. Actually I’m not sure. It was like waves. Every time I thought I was coming down, a new wave of orgasm would just hit me. I didn’t count how many, I didn’t have the brain capacity to even remember my own name. Or it might have been just one giant orgasm that lasted a small eternity.

It was unexpected to say the least. Oliver had no idea what he did to me. I told him of course, but I don’t think he understood just how insane it was. I want to call it my first primal orgasm. I didn’t have to force it, I didn’t have to ask for permission for it, I didn’t even have to think of anything at all. I didn’t even try to cum. That’s why it sneaked up on me, there was no climb at all. It was a grenade I didn’t see coming. It was all sensations, unaltered and unburdened with rules or reason. It was what orgasms should be, the most natural thing in the world. It gave me so much hope that maybe some day, I would be rid of all my mental blocks and just be ‘normal’ with orgasms. At least now I know that my body is capable of it. And I can’t be more grateful.