Courtship Chronicles, part 12 – The Year 2019

So the year 2019 is coming to an end soon enough and it’s time to look back how my year was dating-wise. I do have to admit that I started with a bang. 😀 I was very hard-working and going on first dates quite frequently in the first half of the year. But then my mental health wasn’t doing so good in June and I got super lazy dating-wise. I did write down stuff on my calendar though and with that data, I created a nice infographic to sum it all up. 😀 Let’s go through it together!

So I was on 23 first dates, meeting almost two new people per month. Most were fun, some are weird and some went very well but no second dates. And since I’m not the type to run after anyone, they would fade out quite quickly. I do think that if the conversation doesn’t continue naturally and organically despite a great first date, then there must be not enough interest.

I had ten new partners this year, which means I had sex with ten new people. I had a long debate with several people what counts as sex, but in my humble opinion, my definition for myself is a new dick in my pussy, to put it crudely. A couple of them happens to be dildos attached to strap-ons but in all intent and purposes, it’s the same thing. Out of those ten, five of them were what I like to call ‘accidental one-night-stands’. Meaning I do not ever set out to have a one-night-stand, but sometimes after the first time, I simply don’t want a second time.

I didn’t keep track of how many people I chatted up but it never has gone far enough to set up a date. One guy ghosted me after the first date and I gave him a blowjob just cos I was being nice. Two were pretty flaky, as in they canceled on the day we were supposed to meet for coffee and didn’t make a real effort to re-schedule again. And two didn’t cancel at all, they simply didn’t show up for dates. I would never understand no-shows and ghosting, like what is the purpose of that? Oh well, onto more adventures.

Finally, I also tracked how many of the new people were kinky and how many nillas aka vanillas. Funny enough, most of those seven nillas do claim to be either kinky or even dominant. Well, they weren’t. 😀 And two out of those three kinksters were women and one guy. Yes, you guessed it, the one kinky guy is Oliver. You’ll know who he is if you’ve been following my blog. 😀

It’s the year 2020 next year. And I’m going to challenge myself and get 20 new partners. In other words, I want to double it! All just for fun and for that round number of 20. 😀 Cos, why not right. 😛 So, do expect more content as ‘Courtship Chronicle’ continues, stronger than ever. Until then, stay kinky! 😉

Summer of Discipline

In the beginning of this week, my dreaded state of numbness finally lifted like fog after pressing down on me for over a month. I would like to think that it was partly cos I might have figured out why. I’ve planned this summer of discipline thing for my five weeks of summer vacation months ago. And the closer that I got to my vacation, the less disciplined I’ve been until among other reasons, I kinda let it all go in the beginning of June. And it did not agree with me at all.

See, I thrive in a disciplined environment. That’s why I felt so at ease when I was a 24/7 submissive under a constant level of discipline, like no orgasms without permission and other rules. Although I eventually came to dislike all those rules, I loved the discipline. And even last year when I was single, I had some kind of control still cos I decided to be in celibacy too. But this year was very different. I had goals, like dating a lot etc, but I wasn’t holding myself accountable for anything really. And after being in discipline for years, I have no idea what to do with myself, and I think in June, it all finally caught up to me and started to affect my mental health. It also explained why I planned to do monthly challenges next year and also planned this strict summer vacay, all that planning whole spring. But planning doesn’t mean doing. The terrible state I was in whole June makes me realize that I can’t wait any longer. I need to have constant discipline in order to be a balanced human being.

So what my summer of discipline involves? Well, mostly I want to get back on track with my movie-watching and book-reading goals. Also I want to get back on track with my workouts so I planned a strict daily workout routine. I know I know, resting is just as important as working out, but I actually like the daily grind, I just don’t work the same muscle group daily and would do yoga or stretching on some days. I also wanted to keep my eating habits semi-healthy so I’m going to continue to meal prep. Also I’m not going to change up my sleeping hours too much, so even though I’m on vacation, I’m getting up almost as early as usual, the only difference is me not being as strict on when to go to sleep, as long as I get 7 hours of slumber. I want to test whether having a summer schedule would make getting back to work in August any easier, it just might.

In addition to my tight schedule, I added two challenges. One is a workout challenge. On top of my daily workouts, I’m doing the Saitama Challenge. 😀 I love the anime One-Punch Man (aka Saitama) and he does this workout to train to be the strongest man alive. It’s more of a running joke in the show, cos it’s not really that much that he does. 100 squats, 100 pushups, 100 situps and 10 km run, daily. I’m going to do it for 30 days. Unfortunately though, I can’t run due to my bad knees, but I am going to walk and bike for more than 10 km daily for a month. I’m also going to modify some of the reps just so I don’t get bored. Like doing different kinds of squats and pushups and situps and gradually add the difficulty like adding weight and doing the man’s version of the pushup. We’ll see how it goes. And do join me! Another challenge that I decided to begin in July is one year of no shopping. I know, it’s crazy for a shopaholic like me. I will write more about it later this week.

And since I am a kinkster, of course I have to add a kinky twist to keeping my disciplined life. Although I don’t have a dominant to keep me accountable, I do have a sadistic play partner, the adorable Oliver. I decided to recruit his help to keep me on track with my workouts and no shopping thing. So everytime I miss a workout or buy something, I’m going to get a severe punishment from Oliver in the beginning of our sessions. And if you wonder whether a spanking punishment would really deter a masochist like me, trust me when I say dear Oliver is very good at making me dread his brand of punishments, which is basically his regular nasty style of spanking except meaner. And harder. And with instruments of his choosing. I already got a taste for it yesterday, it would definitely make me think twice about missing a workout or buying shit.

So. I will write about the no-shopping thing on the weekend. And I will also write an update post after my vacay about what accomplishments I unlock after a month. 😀 I know it might sound weird, but disciplined vacation equals a relaxing vacation for me. Hope you have a great summer too!